So there's no need for turning back
'Cause all roads lead to where we stand
'Cause all roads lead to where we stand
And I believe we'll walked them all
No matter what we may have planned
Don McLean, Crossroads
Don McLean, Crossroads
Tuesday, August 16, 2011
Sunday, July 24, 2011
Death
It is never easy to deal with death.
Every time someone dies, it reminds me all over again how fragile and insignificant our lives are. So we go and build up a reputation, save some money in the bank, live a comfortable life, and do good deeds. Then what?
It is unnerving that death is always lurking at the back alley, waiting to catch you. And hey, unless you haven't been around for that long, you'd know that death is the ultimate winner - no one, ABSOLUTELY NO ONE, can run away from it. You may escape it several times, but it WILL catch you one day.
"Utterly meaningless! Everything is meaningless."
Once someone asked me whether I'd:
1. Prefer a slow death from a disease - one might suffer but at least there was time to say goodbye and to make right
2. Prefer to died instantly - suffer less but a surprise and you don't have to wake up every day thinking, "am I going to die today?"
Either way, death sucks. It just does.
"The wages of sin is death."
Now I'm really starting to see how much the Lord hates sin. Do I?
Andy told me death is more difficult for the living than the dead. I guess so. If you have gone to heaven for a party, why would you care for this life anymore? I don't think anyone would want to return to earth. Those who are left behind - they suffer. Hard to imagine, but have to.
"Where, O death, is thy victory? Where, O death, is thy sting?"
God has taken the sting away. Our sins are taken from the east to the west and remembered no more. We have to take the penalty of sin, but we are given eternal life - with Christ in His Kingdom.
For now, let's move on and rejoice that God has been good and BELIEVE that God knows exactly what He's doing.
Every time someone dies, it reminds me all over again how fragile and insignificant our lives are. So we go and build up a reputation, save some money in the bank, live a comfortable life, and do good deeds. Then what?
It is unnerving that death is always lurking at the back alley, waiting to catch you. And hey, unless you haven't been around for that long, you'd know that death is the ultimate winner - no one, ABSOLUTELY NO ONE, can run away from it. You may escape it several times, but it WILL catch you one day.
"Utterly meaningless! Everything is meaningless."
Once someone asked me whether I'd:
1. Prefer a slow death from a disease - one might suffer but at least there was time to say goodbye and to make right
2. Prefer to died instantly - suffer less but a surprise and you don't have to wake up every day thinking, "am I going to die today?"
Either way, death sucks. It just does.
"The wages of sin is death."
Now I'm really starting to see how much the Lord hates sin. Do I?
Andy told me death is more difficult for the living than the dead. I guess so. If you have gone to heaven for a party, why would you care for this life anymore? I don't think anyone would want to return to earth. Those who are left behind - they suffer. Hard to imagine, but have to.
"Where, O death, is thy victory? Where, O death, is thy sting?"
God has taken the sting away. Our sins are taken from the east to the west and remembered no more. We have to take the penalty of sin, but we are given eternal life - with Christ in His Kingdom.
For now, let's move on and rejoice that God has been good and BELIEVE that God knows exactly what He's doing.
Monday, July 11, 2011
Cleasing 907
I feel urges to write especially when there are certain opinions and thoughts that I just have to pen down in coherent and concrete thought before it jumbles up in my head and confuses me till kingdom come.
It used to happen quite often, it seems that I have either less time or is less inspired of just tired.
Andy's teaching in the other room - so I have some "lone" time now to think and write. So I'm going to try to be as short and simple as possible.
In view of the recent happenings in our country, I have gone through a lil' bit of a roller coaster. I source all my news and information from the mainstream media first (who wouldn't?) and I am quite ashamed to say that I was also quite affected by it.
They say Chinese people please stay at home and stock up. I did. (not a lot la but I did). I blamed Bersih 2.0 - I said in my little heart, "why create such trouble? what would happen if it went out of hand?" And this went on for the longest time.
After several weeks, I started to wonder - Ambiga used to be the president of the bar council of Malaysia and she has received an award for her contribution to women's rights. Surely this woman knew what she was doing? I saw her pictures; she didn't look threatening and I was just wondering why she went on despite all the obstacles and threats (death threats included!) It was very difficult to find information about her (that wasn't biased) in the mainstream media so I started searching online.
The week leading to Bersih 2.0, I started reading. And that was the time when I hit myself because I am a trained journalist; surely I knew media (in all forms and glory) is ALWAYS biased. Why have I been so affected one way and not even bother finding out the other story?
The more I found out about Bersih 2.0, the more I understand why it had to be done. I agree, it might not be the best way to get their message out but it was, according to Ambiga, "necessary" because they have tried everything else. This woman addressed her death threats and said, "Bersih 2.0 is not about me. It's about the Raykat". Wow - got guts. Oh my dear heart began to change!
The night before 907, my brother-in-law smsed us to tell us not go to into the city because people were carrying "parangs". Oh my little heart panicked again though I thought these are PROBABLY rumours - and it was confirmed later. So I told my Andy we're NOT going anywhere.
We had friends over for supper and 2 of them were going. I went on FB and found many good friends going. I even read the guidelines from Bersih's website on how to prepare for the day. I wanted to go but my little heart was still afraid. Anyway, the group left very late so we slept in.
When we woke up the next day it was after noon time. I switched on my computer and went online - LIVE STREAMING and LIVE UPDATES were available and I CRIED, thinking why didn't I join.
It was very symbolic, the whole thing. People from all walks of life and all forms in different parts of the city marching towards one direction. They faced obstacle after obstacle but they were never deterred. They continued marching to reach that one purpose.
I broke down.
I have never seen Malaysians so united. At that point, race didn't matter. Religion didn't matter. Colour didn't matter. Status didn't matter. Gender didn't matter. Heck, AGE didn't even matter. They were MALAYSIANS who wants the same thing - change for our future. Old people didn't have to be there; they could just stay at home and relax. They probably won't be part of our future anyway. Yet, they walked.
I have never been so proud to be Malaysian. Deep down inside I love my country - otherwise why would I cry EVERY TIME I listen to "Here in my Home"? It is just that I have been putting it away because people tell me this country is coming to nothing.
I wanted zoom downtown to walk with my brothers and sisters but it was probably too late so I had to be a bystander.
That day, I knew, our countrymen, were more than what we thought or imagined them to be. We were ONE. As long as we stay together, we will NOT be bullied. If we fight for the same purpose with one heart undivided, we'll succeed even if there are obstacles after obstacles.
But I also think we should just leave it as that. Let's not politicise the whole thing, pointing fingers and threatening the government. God put them there for a reason. And they will be the ones accountable to God on how they lead the people and how they used tax payers' money.
For us, let's do something we CAN do. Register to VOTE. If you want change, do your part and pray very hard that our leaders will seek to do the Rakyat right.
In the meantime, HIDUP RAKYAT! :-)
My two cents.
It used to happen quite often, it seems that I have either less time or is less inspired of just tired.
Andy's teaching in the other room - so I have some "lone" time now to think and write. So I'm going to try to be as short and simple as possible.
In view of the recent happenings in our country, I have gone through a lil' bit of a roller coaster. I source all my news and information from the mainstream media first (who wouldn't?) and I am quite ashamed to say that I was also quite affected by it.
They say Chinese people please stay at home and stock up. I did. (not a lot la but I did). I blamed Bersih 2.0 - I said in my little heart, "why create such trouble? what would happen if it went out of hand?" And this went on for the longest time.
After several weeks, I started to wonder - Ambiga used to be the president of the bar council of Malaysia and she has received an award for her contribution to women's rights. Surely this woman knew what she was doing? I saw her pictures; she didn't look threatening and I was just wondering why she went on despite all the obstacles and threats (death threats included!) It was very difficult to find information about her (that wasn't biased) in the mainstream media so I started searching online.
The week leading to Bersih 2.0, I started reading. And that was the time when I hit myself because I am a trained journalist; surely I knew media (in all forms and glory) is ALWAYS biased. Why have I been so affected one way and not even bother finding out the other story?
The more I found out about Bersih 2.0, the more I understand why it had to be done. I agree, it might not be the best way to get their message out but it was, according to Ambiga, "necessary" because they have tried everything else. This woman addressed her death threats and said, "Bersih 2.0 is not about me. It's about the Raykat". Wow - got guts. Oh my dear heart began to change!
The night before 907, my brother-in-law smsed us to tell us not go to into the city because people were carrying "parangs". Oh my little heart panicked again though I thought these are PROBABLY rumours - and it was confirmed later. So I told my Andy we're NOT going anywhere.
We had friends over for supper and 2 of them were going. I went on FB and found many good friends going. I even read the guidelines from Bersih's website on how to prepare for the day. I wanted to go but my little heart was still afraid. Anyway, the group left very late so we slept in.
When we woke up the next day it was after noon time. I switched on my computer and went online - LIVE STREAMING and LIVE UPDATES were available and I CRIED, thinking why didn't I join.
It was very symbolic, the whole thing. People from all walks of life and all forms in different parts of the city marching towards one direction. They faced obstacle after obstacle but they were never deterred. They continued marching to reach that one purpose.
I broke down.
I have never seen Malaysians so united. At that point, race didn't matter. Religion didn't matter. Colour didn't matter. Status didn't matter. Gender didn't matter. Heck, AGE didn't even matter. They were MALAYSIANS who wants the same thing - change for our future. Old people didn't have to be there; they could just stay at home and relax. They probably won't be part of our future anyway. Yet, they walked.
I have never been so proud to be Malaysian. Deep down inside I love my country - otherwise why would I cry EVERY TIME I listen to "Here in my Home"? It is just that I have been putting it away because people tell me this country is coming to nothing.
I wanted zoom downtown to walk with my brothers and sisters but it was probably too late so I had to be a bystander.
That day, I knew, our countrymen, were more than what we thought or imagined them to be. We were ONE. As long as we stay together, we will NOT be bullied. If we fight for the same purpose with one heart undivided, we'll succeed even if there are obstacles after obstacles.
But I also think we should just leave it as that. Let's not politicise the whole thing, pointing fingers and threatening the government. God put them there for a reason. And they will be the ones accountable to God on how they lead the people and how they used tax payers' money.
For us, let's do something we CAN do. Register to VOTE. If you want change, do your part and pray very hard that our leaders will seek to do the Rakyat right.
In the meantime, HIDUP RAKYAT! :-)
My two cents.
Tuesday, May 17, 2011
How Much Are You Worth?
These few days I have been bumming over some thoughts.
I am an educator, and my first and foremost priority is my students. Whatever I have started, I should end - and never leave them hanging.
I discipline them - because that's what they need in this world.
I teach them values that will help them be good people.
I teach them skills that will help them in life.
I have never taken a day off teaching - unless I'm really sick and cannot get off my bed.
That's my commitment to my students and that's what I expect other educators to do.
I believe that if you are an educator too, you would agree.
In fact, most educators don't mind going the extra mile for their students.
And why?
Because we're commited, not to our jobs, but to our students.
I'm not trying to boast here, but everywhere I went, my bosses wanted me. The first job I quit, my boss counter offered me - asking me to stay and willing to give me a better position. I turned her down but she wished me well.
The last job that I quit, my boss knew I was starting my own business so she wished me well but she said that her door is ALWAYS opened, even if she didn't need any staff.
When I left my lecturing job to start this school, my students asked me to stay. Even until now (2 semesters have gone by), they're constantly asking me to go back. They said they need to be "inspired". I don't know whether or not I can truly inspire, but I know I have given them my best and it is very fulfilling to see that my efforts are recognise.
And that is my point. How much are you worth? Do you truly work with passion and commitment that people around you can see and feel? Even if they don't, do you persevere because you're committed to the job, not the company?
And if you want to leave, do your bosses ask you to stay? Do they think you're worth it?
If they let you leave without a fight, then maybe it's time to reevaluate your work performance and your heart.
I told several teachers today how much I appreciate them for their effort and commitment to their students. Educators who truly love their students should be appreciated and rewarded. And that's what I want to do here.
Have a good day and be passionate about what you do.
Signing off another mile
I am an educator, and my first and foremost priority is my students. Whatever I have started, I should end - and never leave them hanging.
I discipline them - because that's what they need in this world.
I teach them values that will help them be good people.
I teach them skills that will help them in life.
I have never taken a day off teaching - unless I'm really sick and cannot get off my bed.
That's my commitment to my students and that's what I expect other educators to do.
I believe that if you are an educator too, you would agree.
In fact, most educators don't mind going the extra mile for their students.
And why?
Because we're commited, not to our jobs, but to our students.
I'm not trying to boast here, but everywhere I went, my bosses wanted me. The first job I quit, my boss counter offered me - asking me to stay and willing to give me a better position. I turned her down but she wished me well.
The last job that I quit, my boss knew I was starting my own business so she wished me well but she said that her door is ALWAYS opened, even if she didn't need any staff.
When I left my lecturing job to start this school, my students asked me to stay. Even until now (2 semesters have gone by), they're constantly asking me to go back. They said they need to be "inspired". I don't know whether or not I can truly inspire, but I know I have given them my best and it is very fulfilling to see that my efforts are recognise.
And that is my point. How much are you worth? Do you truly work with passion and commitment that people around you can see and feel? Even if they don't, do you persevere because you're committed to the job, not the company?
And if you want to leave, do your bosses ask you to stay? Do they think you're worth it?
If they let you leave without a fight, then maybe it's time to reevaluate your work performance and your heart.
I told several teachers today how much I appreciate them for their effort and commitment to their students. Educators who truly love their students should be appreciated and rewarded. And that's what I want to do here.
Have a good day and be passionate about what you do.
Signing off another mile
Monday, April 18, 2011
Depression
A good friend once told me that apparently the number of Christians (she said this is actually from a study) suffer from depression is lower than most others. And I can see why. Even when we're depressed, we read words like these,
"Never will I leave you; never will I forsake you."
"Fear not, I will help thee."
"Take heart. I have overcome the world."
It is indeed reassuring to know that the Lord of this universe is interested in us and loved us enough to send His Son to die for us. After going through all that trouble, I think He wouldn't just leave us to find our own way home.
But it is still tough battling depressive thoughts so I need to hold on.
Please hang on with me.
"Never will I leave you; never will I forsake you."
"Fear not, I will help thee."
"Take heart. I have overcome the world."
It is indeed reassuring to know that the Lord of this universe is interested in us and loved us enough to send His Son to die for us. After going through all that trouble, I think He wouldn't just leave us to find our own way home.
But it is still tough battling depressive thoughts so I need to hold on.
Please hang on with me.
Thursday, April 7, 2011
Dear Blog
Wow I had this really long blog about what blogging meant to me and how it in some ways changed my life but because of my own stupid doing I deleted the whole thing. So, anyway, to sum it all up, I want to start blogging again, for all the good reasons which I have just deleted away. Haha
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